"If you don't know which side kicks first, you want to average out the leverage for each kick pairing. You'd then set out your kickers from best to worst as: #4, #2, #3, #1, #5. If your side kicks first, the way to do it is #5, #2, #4, #3, #1; second is #4, #2, #3, #1, #5, the same as if you didn't know at all." With all the talk of Ronaldo waiting to go fifth in the Euro 2012 semi-final between Spain and Portugal, some of y'all might find this statistical breakdown of how to determine optimal penalty shoutout order as interesting as I did.